Dear VixChix

[gerald strine]

Dear Vix Chick
My wifes shopping is cutting into the money I have for new hunting gear
causing tension in the family what can I do?
Respectfully
last years gear
Michigan

[Doe Master]

Dear Vixchix
The hunting season has ended and I have been watching video`s from the blind in my livingroom .
Is this normal behavior ?
Signed
Anonymous

[VixChix]

Dear Michigan:

One word: eBay

While you're wife is out shopping put some of her stuff on eBay, then use the proceeds to buy your new gear. Easy Peasey!

With any luck you will be way out in the woods in your new duds before she finds out.

Respectfully,
Vix

P.S. You might be able to make extra points with her by selling her iron & ironing board, the vacuum, and the pots & pans.

[VixChix]

Dear Vixchix
The hunting season has ended and I have been watching video`s from the blind in my livingroom .
Is this normal behavior ?
Signed
Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

Yes, your behaviour is normal.

In fact, I'd encourage you to enrich the experience by digging out your deer or turkey calls and practicing while watching.

You should also consider keeping your Excalibur in the blind with you.

If you are still concerned that your behaviour is unusual, I recommend you attend an upcoming meeting of HA (Hunter's Anonymous) to reassure yourself that you are not alone in your addiction. I understand there is a meeting this weekend at Uncle Fester's at which members will share their coping mechanisms with each other. I'm sure you'll leave that gathering feeling like you're fairly normal.

Respectfully,
Vix

[gerald strine]

Dear Michigan:

One word: eBay

While you're wife is out shopping put some of her stuff on eBay, then use the proceeds to buy your new gear. Easy Peasey!

With any luck you will be way out in the woods in your new duds before she finds out.

Respectfully,
Vix

P.S. You might be able to make extra points with her by selling her iron & ironing board, the vacuum, and the pots & pans.

Thanks Vix you are a life saver I had not thought of E bay .
She never uses the iron,vacume or rarely the pots and pans she will never miss them but I need to keep the iron skillet for the venison.But those Twilight scopes are kind of pricey any other ideas.

[strum]

thank you vixchix for being there for us we need the help
for the record i have the best wife in the world..she always gets up with me and makes sure im fed and have what i need before i go out and if i call on the way in she will have a fresh pot o coffe for me ..and if i do get a deer she will be ready with camera and even jumps right in there to help me get it skinned ans quartered..
ok nuff of that back to needing help
dear vixchix,
what do i do about that job thing..seems like every time the season starts theres sombody wanting me to work. it never fails. what should i do?

[georgiaboy]

Dear Vixchix
Hunting season has only been over for me for one week and i already have a severe case of cabin fever!!
The chores around the house have piled up, the wife wants me " to spend quality time" with her and my dog doesn't even recognize me anymore
All i want to do is climb a tree & kill something...WHAT SHOULD I DO!!
Lonely & confused in Georgia.

[Big58cal]

Dear VixChick,

Everytime I go huntin' or fishin', my wife suspects I'm going to see another woman. I have assured her many times that this is not the case. I have even brought home deer and fish to prove it. What should I do to alleviate her concerns?

Desperate husband,

Maple

Maple, I didn't know that it was still "possible" at your age? Maybe you shouldn't have gotten the prescription of Viagra, then the wife wouldn't be suspicious.

It's threads like this that make me feel like the luckiest dude alive.
Sunday I woke to the the smell of coffee, came down to see my hunting duds laid on the spam floor in the order I put them on..
My coffee was was on my bed-stand, wife looking over me saying it looked like a good day to hunt.
Got dressed and headed out to take a stand, on the way out the door I heard "call on your way back, I will have breakfast ready".
You mean that's not what everyone hears?

Pydpiper, it sounds like the wife was waiting for you to leave so that the milk man could come over to make a delivery. Probably the reason she wants you to call before coming back.

[TPM]

Dear Vix
I came home today and found my awesome wife cleaning and re-arranging all the spam cabinets. She followed it up by making a delicious supper. What can I do to reward her? I want to suck up but I don't want it to be obvious. Do you think she'd like a foot rub or something?

[VixChix]

dear vixchix,
what do i do about that job thing..seems like every time the season starts theres sombody wanting me to work. it never fails. what should i do?

Dear Strum,

You are in a real conundrum: To work or not to work? That is the question. (Since the question of whether or not to hunt would be moot.)

I can only offer you two suggestions:
1 - Retire
2 - Find a career which would provide an income while hunting (perhaps as a writer for a hunting magazine, wildlife photographer, or even possibly an advice columnist).

I'm very sorry I couldn't be of further assistance to you, Strum.

Wishing you many happy hours afield and a healthy bank balance!

Sincerely,
Vix

[VixChix]

Dear Vixchix
Hunting season has only been over for me for one week and i already have a severe case of cabin fever!!
The chores around the house have piled up, the wife wants me " to spend quality time" with her and my dog doesn't even recognize me anymore
All i want to do is climb a tree & kill something...WHAT SHOULD I DO!!
Lonely & confused in Georgia.

Dear Confused,

I can certainly understand why you're confused: For you "quality time" undoubtedly means time in the woods; while for your wife it likely means time spent crossing items off the endless Honey Do list, shopping together, staying awake while watching a chick flick, or visiting her mother with you.

Since your definition of "quality time" isn't going to change, your only hope is to try to change her interpretation of "quality".

Might I suggest that you introduce her to the joys of spending long hours in the woods? You might have to bring along a paperback, women's magazine, iPhone, or other distraction the first few times; however she'll likely soon come to understand why hunting is so much more important than the housework.

There may be a price to be paid for re-defining "quality time" for her: It won't be long before she will need her own hunting gear. Also, there is a good possibility that you will end up at home with the dog and looking after the place, so that your wife can get her quota of quality time and not succumb to cabin fever herself.

Perhaps some chores and chick flicks might be the lesser of the evils?

Sincerely,
Vix

[VixChix]

Dear Vix
I came home today and found my awesome wife cleaning and re-arranging all the spam cabinets. She followed it up by making a delicious supper. What can I do to reward her? I want to suck up but I don't want it to be obvious. Do you think she'd like a foot rub or something?

Dear TPM

Your wife sounds delightful. You are a very fortunate man indeed! I dare say that you are almost as fortunate as Pydpiper in your choice of spouse.

I am given to understand that today is a special day for the two of you - it's been 12 years since you met for the first time. I wish you a Happy Anniversary and advise you not to worry about being too obvious about sucking up, as you put it. There's no point in practicing the pretense of discretion. Go ahead and spoil your lovely wife!

Sincerely yours,
Vix

[georgiaboy]

Your right again as usual vix...if i try to introduce her to the outdoors i might in the long run DECREASE my woods time rather than INCREASE it.
I guess i will do some chores and swallow my pride & watch a chick flick ( heaven forbid the fella's find out ) but a trip to the mother in laws...well that's just asking for more than one man can stand
Thanks Vix...your the best!!

[VixChix]

Your right again as usual vix...if i try to introduce her to the outdoors i might in the long run DECREASE my woods time rather than INCREASE it.
I guess i will do some chores and swallow my pride & watch a chick flick ( heaven forbid the fella's find out ) but a trip to the mother in laws...well that's just asking for more than one man can stand

Dear Gentleman,

Given a bit more time to let your situation percolate, I believe there is yet one other option. See the earlier post by "Anonymous" who set up his blind in the living room and watched hunting videos. I sincerely believe that if you did the same, you may well find yourself (along with the blind, the chair, and the movie media) outdoors - which is just what you are hoping for.

Wishing you joy and much success whichever path you decide to follow!

Respectfully,
Vix

[one shot scott]

Happy anniversary Tim and Moni!